when the sexual tension/build up in a fic is just right and your toes are curling and you’re basically speed reading and skimming because you just wanna get to the smut but also you wanna slow down and savor each brush of fingers and gaze and swooping feeling in the stomach or the biting of lips and clenching of hands and shuffling of feet and
this needs one of those Patrick gifs
about a week ago i found this in a goodwill, one of those “grow in water” toys but
there’s no pictures of what might be inside besides the awful baby clipart, and i am insanely curious about whats actually in the egg
15 hour adventure starting now
9 hours in and there is a crack on the egg, i repeat, crack on the egg
what if it’s really not a baby and it’s a turd
WELL WE GON FIND OUT
hour 23 WHAT THE FUFCK IS THAT
THE EGG CONTAINED SOME KIND OF ELDRITCH MONSTROSITY THAT IS NOT A BABY ABORT MISSION ABORT ABORT
I JUST WENT AHEAD AND TOOK IT APART
OH
HOLY PISSING HELL
MY CHILD
ITS BEAUTIFUL
